in the valley of your heart

remember what i said about having long posts, and wow if i remember i think i also said i wasn't going to be as active in may? well i have made the most number of posts this month and i am going to upload many pictures in this post. (i change my mind so many times its unbelieveable!) i did this shoot ages ago and when i went through my folders today i went over each and every picture from that day and i was surprised why i didn't like those before? so here goes 5 hours of retouching i did today :)

currently listening to: 


these are a few of the attempts in 'tugging the flower and looking like you are in love with it'


when i look back at myself a few months ago i was so obsessed with getting the perfect shot. i was too concerned with the buttons in my camera and now i realise i was missing out on all of these moments. few months ago i would look at these pictures and be disappointed but now i seem to love every picture (well almost!) regardless of how they are. maybe its because i don't care about perfection anymore. maybe just because i have changed. i want to start capturing fleeting moments to turn them into memories. i want to look at my pictures and i want it to conjure some kind of emotion in me. i want everyone else to feel the same way too.
see the other pictures from this shoot i uploaded previously here



the quality has decreased by a million and the sharpness has gone out of the window.
 why can't you show my pictures the way they are blogger!

a happy ending


don't you just love it when for once its not raining or windy or the sky isn't grey! this week couldn't have been better! blue skies in the summer heat, sunsets in all its glory over the violet-orange skyline! i want more days like these!! perfect lighting for ideal summer shoots but because of exams i haven't been able to shoot :( please weather, stay like this after my exams and i'll take pictures every day i swear. 4 of my exams are done and dusted, 5 more yet to go :( june 10 seems like such a long way to go. here is the last batch of the pictures with the lovely swapnil gurung. i haven't got much to say on the supposed story that was meant to be built on but basically here's what happens next, the queen finally finds herself again and she dances to celebrate and decides to live as a peasent for the rest of her life. she's happy, we all are happy end of story! yay :D


ps: i have a new header! do you like it? on future posts, i think i am only going to upload 'good' pictures from now on or perhaps split some posts in two. i just realised most of my posts are too long and with pictures i wouldn't necessarily say are the best ones. if i can select a small batch, lets say, 7 or 8 pictures per shoot i could spend more time on them. i could always come back to them at a later time anyway so quality over quantity it is from now on! :D
pps: this week i've been listening to the courteneers when walking to and back from college :)


and there was sun, sun, sun


either i work on way too many pictures to remember which ones i have edited or i'm just plain forgetful. i found these sets of pictures the other day and i was actually quite surprised to see them because i had completely forgotten about them and to see i had edited these but to never have posted earlier, i thought i should totally be mad! anywhoo this was more than a month ago when we helped out karuna didi with her photoshoot. these are just random pictures i took that day. the ones that she took came out amazing! they have been put up in an exhibition in farnborough college of technology, so if you are near this area feel free to go to the photography building of the college to see lots of awesome pictures! :)
also my exams have started and so have our study leave. i've been revising pretty much every day for a month now (such a geek i know) so i haven't been able to do any shoots lately (except for a little self portrait i did for lookbook :P), but i do plan to do a loooooot once exams are out of the way. hopefully i will introduce you to some new faces (which i'm quite excited about!) and no surprise you will see these lot in the new pictures so hope you aren't fed up with them :P i have so so many ideas and i can't wait to show them all to you. on a side note, my obsession with temper trap has managed to make a comeback! sweet disposition was stuck in my head during my chemistry exam today and it was so difficult to concentrate!
ps: i am really happy today! :D

they were doing a bit of clothes swapping thing. i love how they still manage to pose with the weirdest postures and maintain their cool.
 the two black and whites look a bit odd in the midst of all these colour ones but i liked them better than colour. the (shy) person below is sony. merina took her gorgeous picture and the other one of us acting like we know what we are doing (lol) is by karuna didi :)

you are my sweetest downfall.

i don't know whats wrong with me! i should really be revising but for the past few days (right before exams) i have lost my will to take in anymore of the things that i have to know in order to prove my worth (this always happens to me before exams argh). i sometimes i feel like the only reason i go to college is to please my parents. i daydream a lot. i daydream of the things i would rather be doing. now, more than ever, i'm starting to think a lot, about what i want to do, about who i want to be. i'm trying my best to 'put my head in the game'. it'd better be worth it in the end, i hope. anyways enough of my incessant blubbering! i hadn't realised i had already edited these pictures (i should really try to remember where i save my files). i think i was planning to re-edit them but then again, i was at a everything-i-do-is-shit stage and now im at a i-don't-want-perfection-cos-thats-not-who-i-am stage, so here you are, imperfect and unfinished they might be, i like them just the way they are (call me lazy if you want, i couldn't care less)

ps: i am currently in awe of regina spektor. such an amaing singer and songwriter. her songs are like poetry, so much depth and so much meaning!
pps: this is continued from the pre-previous post :) if you haven't seen it yet, do so! thank you swapnil didi once again! you are a star :)

the country was becoming increasingly aware of what was happening to their beloved queen- or what remained of their queen. politicians warned that the instant, foreign countries knew of the situation, an invasion was inevitable. the people decided that they needed a new ruler, someone who could keep them safe, and so they turned their backs on their queen, who was once the person they looked up to. 

when she no longer was the queen, then she finally saw what she had become and with all the willpower and courage she had, she finally took off the mask. ashamed of herself, she couldn't show her face to her people, and so she fled from her own country, leaving all she ever loved.
 left to her own measures, she was helpless, and lost, and afraid, and no one but herself to guide her. she didn't know where she was going, but go she would.

 it was heartbreaking to see what had become of her. it was the wretched mask still. even though it was gone, her soul was still attached to it. it made her want to take revenge.

sometimes she would be vengeful and sometimes she would be forgiving. one thing was true, that her old self was still there inside, trying to fight off the demons inside of her.

no one remembers the last time they had seen her but years and years long gone, her stories were passed down to generations of those who were loyal to her, the story of the queen, her rise and her downfall.

so yeah this is kinda the end of this story, but i do have an alternate more happier ending and i did try to find if i had miraculously edited those as well but sadly i can confirm i haven't so it will take a while! i certainly prefer the other ending i have thought of but that is just my wishful thinking and my vision of how good prevails evil at the end (lol) sorry for not writing much of the story and i know its not explained very well, or for the matter of fact, written in a decent readable way but i really can't be arsed! yes typical me! anywhoo take care my believers (:P) i will study hard like i've never done before! see you my fellow nepalese people in chandi and gurkha cup. i am thinking of possibly (if i gather enough courage) ask people i don't know to let me take their pictures there (like the awesomecool people do in streetblogs ftw!i can't be any sadder) but that will depend on the amount of lucozade i will have taken on those days :P